Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Hi. I'm me.

I make big fluffy clouds. That's what I do. I go outside and I want them to be. So they are. You see, they're really nice on nights like this when the moon's really bright. Moon lights 'em up on one side, and you even got the city shining below all orange. Looks like the first signs of sunrise on the sea, but no. They have an opaque glow about them. Good for neck-cramping, jaw-gaped stares.

One time I wanted a halo, and, then, it...happened. Ok, ok, so I kinda thought it might. But still. I mean.
I was having a nice night. Don't remember details, but I'm sure I have it written somewhere. I'd just got home. Had kind of a funky place without much yard of my (our) own. But there were a couple of grass-and-tree infested patches throughout the complex that even had a nice little hilly incline that made for good jaw-gaped stares- no neck-cramping as you could recline against the hill supporting the neck nicely for lookin' up.
I used to like finding good looking spots all the time then. My favorite was at the jetty at the beach. Rocks make good backrests, but I went there more for sentimental value and usually wouldn't actually sprawl out on the rocks in the jetty at all. They were cold and wet, and slimy. I liked the waves and the sea air. These were good things rolled up inside my positive cumulative experience at the beach. Some good times had been had there, with some good people. But it had most always been more of a general idea of well-being than wrapped into any particular person or experience. So I would go there. Even though it was at least 30 minutes each way.

This night, I don't remember why-even though I'm sure I could look it up if I wanted too, I didn't feel like going to the beach. But I don't remember it feeling at all as I was settling for the slope in front of my neighbors' garages. I was good there, and immediate gratification was nice. It gratified.

I remember now that I'm sure I wrote about that night in one of my places, because I remember having it with me. I made one of those rash, cocky desires that could do no good to the wisher should they come true, demanding nature satify me with a halo around the moon. Sometimes 1+1=2 can be tricky if you can't recognize the 1's. I'm sure I did innately, but I'm don't think I had consciously realized that the moon haloes over when the air humid past the point of humid, but more misty even. It was that night, and the light from everything else was refracting. I loved the fuzzy lights I associated with my nights at the beach, which I so often replicated. Fuzzy lights, haloed moons, make me feel well.

So I wanted it- wrote about it too, I think- and it was. I'm not gonna say I got a God complex or anything. And perhaps a mini-spike in self-confidence was hardly a bad thing for me at the time as well. But it was special. I wanted it, and it was.

Friday, January 30, 2009

Something to loosen up the ol' typing fingers

Just sneaking in a quick mindless post before I get into the more dour stuff. Writing for the sake of writing is fun, used to do it all the time-been 'bout 8 years since I was doing the last of it.
I've done two posts on each blog now, and I've known since even before I sat down and created either blog that it wouldn't really take form until I've put up a third post. For both blogs, the first post was a basic introduction and the second was a refining of the theory and the idea behind why I wanted to create these in the first place. So, now on the 3rd post, the blog truly begins- that is it now truly takes on the form it will have from here into the foreseeable future.
Initially, this post was going to be all different. Some dry economic theory kinda thing (to follow shortly). But a little while ago I decided I still wanted to have some nonsense posts as well as some political/economics posts on these e-pages. They'll have little to nothing to do with each other, and should this blog eventually attract readers, they'll likely be turned off by one or the other. But a third blog seems a bit excessive, no?
Blogs are all about pouring out ideas on a web, and seeing what sticks. But I always found writing most entertaining when even the most poorly-formed ideas are allowed to come out, a nice brain purge if you will. To be honest, it's still hard for me right now to lower the internal censors enough to really let the nonsense come gushing out as it sees fit. Let's say I feel like I've got a mouthful of thoughts, but I've got a snorkel tube stuck on my lips so the only way to expel ideas is push them up and out through the top of the tube. Hopefully with a little practice at doing this again I'll be able to just open my mouth, so to speak, and let the thoughts come drooling out over my chin.

Monday, January 19, 2009

What exactly...

I like exact. I like logic, and clean answers. But that's how I classify, not how I produce. This blog will probably focus mainly on two topics that philosophers have grappled with for ages: Basketball and politics. Bear with me, that statement could only be made couched in the language of a bad joke. Those happen to be the things that I think a lot about lately. The basketball thing could be tough after I move to Italy.
So I may try to rigidly structure these posts, so as to spare my non-sport loving readers the tedium of scrolling past a long-winded analysis of a bunch of sweaty guys in tank tops.
In truth, at this moment I have a lot to say about Basketball, and not much else. But I expect to write about the not much else frequently, I'm just not too sure yet what form it'll take, or if it'll have any form at all.
After sleeping on it, I'll spare the uninterested from the basketball altogether. Blogs are cheap, I just make another one.


It could matter. A blog. Hardly a novel thing this day and age. But it could matter, maybe even be important. Sure, it's an arrogant assumption. It might not be that my words become important to an insatiable group of readers. Maybe it will just somehow lead me to something I need to do, something important. I was familiar with the media of the blog, but I must give credit to my millennial friends Eugene and Rachel who introduced me to the modesty and possible relevance of the format. Of course, the Carla has wanted me to write for some time, but this is the first time I will write for the public consumption.
I guess why it really happened now though is I've always been comfortable enough with monotony-I think it's important to enjoy the every day. But now I'd like to take the chance, maybe to luck my way into something that matters.